“Mmmmm, limonene.” -or- Those April Fresh Leftovers.

I’m sure I'm pirating some form of trademarked advertising phrase (way to go you mass marketing peeps!). Regardless, I thought I’d share a peculiar experience with you today.

A and I enjoyed take out pizza last night. We were excited to discover the local pizza joint now offers whole wheat pizza dough, so we gave it a try. We get pretty psyched for anything that resembles a healthier alternative to the usual fare. It wasn’t too bad, really – a little heavier and drier than the typical artificially-enriched, chewy white crust - but it was packed with fibery, vitamin-rich, whole wheat goodness. The brown, sandpaper-like texture was an interesting change too – I could have sanded our chopping block with the toasted crust. But I should also point out that it maintained absolute firmness and crispness in the face of a moisture onslaught. Our usual veggie/mushroom toppings tend to saturate take out pizza, and leave us with limp-crust syndrome.

Due to the robustness of the new crust, we each ate a bit less pizza than usual – probably a good thing seeing as we’re heading to the beach in February. So we dutifully packed the leftovers into serving-sized portions for the next few days’ lunches. A, being her usual kind and thoughtful self, made sure I had a few leftover slabs for consumption today (I use the term “slab” instead of “slice,” because slice seems like a gross understatement for this particular species of pie). So she lovingly placed my portion into an innocent looking previously used zip lock bag, and tucked it away in the fridge for me to grab in the morning. Little did I know that this seemingly innocent bag would really kick up the fresh flavor of my humble repast.

So 11:39AM rolled around today at the office, and my stomach was engaged in its usual lunchtime alarm-ringing. I enjoy leftover pizza cold and coagulated - straight outta da fridge, yo. So I eagerly retrieved the slabs, and started devouring the first of two. I got through the first slab and was licking my fingers when I detected the faint "smell of fresh laundry". Or was it fresh-laundry taste? Initially, I wrote it off as a rising waft of the clean, freshly pressed pants I was wearing. As I continued working online, I casually reached for the second slab and failed to notice the small, gauzy napkin-looking thing left at the bottom of the bag. I made it half-way through this slab only to taste/smell “laundry” again - this time it was stronger, and tainted my mushrooms! I was finally suspicious enough to take a look in the bag. To my surprise (and quiet concern) I pulled out a slim stack of pizza-greased-but-otherwise-unused fabric softener (dryer) sheets. Alas...my rough and ready pizza had been...snuggled.

I dropped the remaining crusty portion, and immediately proceeded to google “dryer sheets+toxic,” only to be dismayed by the rather horrific reports I found - many of which claimed that dryer sheets contained a plethora of harmful chemicals, and were considered by some to be among the most toxic offenders in a typical American household. While I won’t be rushing to call poison control just yet, when you stop to consider that these industrial chemicals are impregnated in your clothing, and you wear that clothing against your skin - the body's largest organ - day in and day out, you can’t help but wonder what it’s potentially doing to you. I honestly hadn't thought about it before this perfumed pizza moment. I mean, static-free, fresh-smelling clothing is definitely worth rubbing known carcinogens (like limonene) against your bum every day...right?

Needless to say, I’ve decided we’re going to try NaHCO3 (sodium bicarbonate, AKA baking soda) in the wash next time. Yeah, it's also an artificially produced industrial substance, but it's water soluble, and a probably a lot safer. Supposedly it softens your clothes rather well, and ironically, prevents farting too, if you cook with it (cripes! why haven't we tried that yet?).

In the meantime, we obviously need to make sure we’re not being overzealous in our zip lock re-use program at home. Our marriage is good (as far as I know), so how a bag of leftover dryer sheets got into my leftover lunch bag will likely remain a mystery...

HNY

Happy New Year!

Yes, I know - I got off to a roaring start here, and then became distracted by the holidays (and suffered from a bout of general laziness). So I haven't posted in a few weeks. Now that 2008 has begun, I have made it a "sorta" resolution to try to post more often. That said, this is going to be a short one, so cheers to you all, and I wish you a very happy and healthy 2008! More to come, I promise...